Yesterday we rented a U-Haul truck to move some furniture around. After spending a few hours killing time waiting for the truck to be ready, we were finally packed and ready to head out to my parents’ house around 1:30. We were anxious to get moving by then. Simon drove the truck, and I followed with the kids. Ten minutes into the ride, James informs me he needs to poo. Great! That means we can’t just stop along the side of the road. I actually have to find a bathroom. Not easy when you are on the expressway. I ask him if he could wait until we got to my parents’ house.
I signal to Simon that I am getting off. We find a CVS. I take James in while Simon stays with Sophia. I ask for the bathroom. I am told it is locked, but I can ask Linda in cosmetics to unlock it. Of course, Linda isn’t in cosmetics. I look for her, but she is nowhere. I decide I can’t wait. Back to the car. I ask Simon to take James into the Outback. He returns a few minutes later to tell me it is closed. Great. Simon wants to get on the road. I say good bye to him, and head off to a Wauldbaum’s down the road. All the time, Sophia is asking a million questions…Why are we going this way, Why are we stopping, Where is daddy, What’s that? She is driving me crazy. I am now heading into Wauldbaum’s with both children. I ask for the bathroom. It is out a back door, through a store room, up a dreary stairwell and through the staff lunch room. I find the men’s room first, but decide not to use it, as it is also a locker room. I finally find the women’s room. James is desperate by now. He dashes into the bathroom, then stops dead in his tracks. He turns to me, and in a disgusted voice, he proclaims, “It’s Pink!”
I could have killed him!